The Global Campaign for Men and Boys
Will future generations look back at today’s media portrayals of men and be shocked at how sexist they are asks Glen Poole, author of Equality For Men.
There’s a popular internet trend that involves sharing pictures of old advertising campaigns to reveal just how sexist we used to be back in the day.
One of my favourites is a bizarre list of dating advice from the 1930s that tells women how to behave when out with a man. The tips include don’t sit awkwardly, don’t talk while dancing (when a man dances he wants to dance) and when it’s time for a conversation only talk about the things that he wants to talk about.
In short if you want to please a man, then only do what pleases him. Of course you’ll never find such sexist advice being dished out today, that is unless the boot was on the other foot and the advice was directed at men.
Enter The Metro newspaper, which recently produced a list of 27 things that men do in bed that women hate. The article offers captions like “why do some men get it so wrong” alongside disgusted comments from female readers about pubic “man stubble”; “His smelly sack. Vom!” and wanting to be sick all over a man’s penis.
Nuggets of wisdom for male readers who want to do a better job of pleasing women in bed include “just don’t talk” (an instruction which echoes the dancing advice given to dating women in the 1930s) and a warning from one woman that there are times during sex when she wants to “turn around and punch [men] in the face”.
It’s hard to imagine any mainstream newspaper in the UK running an article about men with comments about “her smelly flaps”, wanting to be sick over a woman’s vagina or wanting to punch a woman in the face during sex; unless it was highlighting the men’s misogyny, sexism and violence against women.
So why is it okay in 2013 to give women a platform to talk about men in this way in the mainstream media and call it a lifestyle feature? Is it any less offensive or sexist than the dating advice given to women in the 1930s?
To give you a flavour of the bedroom advice The Metro’s female readers have to offer, here’s our abridged list of five sexist sex tips for men:
1. She’s your sex partner not your sparring partner
Gents, try not to do your partner an injury during the sex act, women generally don’t like nipple biting, hair pulling hard spanking and the type of aggressive foreplay that leads to internal bleeding and bruising, so steady on chaps!
2. Stop being so f**king anal
Now listen here. The lovely ladies who read The Metro are not so keen on you sticking a sneaky finger in their tradesmen’s entrance during foreplay; trying to have anal sex behind their backs without warning (or lubrication) or having your fingers stuck in all of their holes at the same time, as this can be quite confusing, so let’s have none of that!
3. Don’t be so dirty in bed
Yes, believe it not, the womenfolk want you to wash your man bits, so make sure you stock up on supplies of carbolic soap if you’re planning on having a spot of luck with a lovely lady anytime in the near future.
4. Don’t say “show me the money” shot
This tip’s also a little difficult to swallow, but apparently women don’t’ really want you to come in their hair, their eyes or all over their faces. Who’d have guessed that women are not turned on by men who ejaculate into their eyes, there’s no pleasing some people!
5. Don’t come at it so quickly (or slowly)
Finally, three different women help clear up any confusion and uncertainty that men may feel about the female orgasm, namely: don’t stop until she comes; don’t hold back hoping she’ll orgasm first and don’t be moody if you don’t make her come. Well that clears that up then!
If you can bear to read the full list of 27 things men do in bed that women hate, you can find it at the The Metro’s website or you could wait 50 years or so when it might resurface as an example of how sexist women in the media were about men in 2013.
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—Photo Credit: Flickr/sillygwailo